Move from 22.9999...to 23
I'm turning to 23 today. Twenty three is not a big number, but I somehow don't want to celebrate it this year. I wasn't as stoked as how I was when turning to 21. I feel old, all of a sudden.
Now I'm teaching at a language center after quitting my job at the PR agency early this year. Some of my students are office workers while many of them are college students or highschoolers. I was teaching here two years ago, and I felt so young by then. Now I feel older with those young kids surrounding me. They are always full of energy and vitality. I guess the social discpline teaches us to be in accordance with the social value. Thus, we gradually lose the pure heart we used to have, and we also lose the vitality.
Thank my college mates, who was sort of throwing a party for me last Sunday. Thank you for the sweet present from L'Occitane.
Thank my family for the sexy present from Kookai Lingerie. That set of pink underwear is hot!
Thank Simon for taking my and my family to Schwarzwald, the fine Germany restaurant. I had a great time there. (Espcially thank my sis for her wit to win a bottle of Erdinger, the Germany beer, for me.)
Thank those friends who sent me cards, phone calls or e-mails.
And Happy Birthday to myself, Claire!
纏足與高跟鞋的迷思
昨天坐在車上,我突發奇想:
我一直都是個大腳丫的女孩子,小時候買鞋子都要買男生的最小號的鞋,隨著年紀越大,比我年輕了人腳丫子也越長越大,我7.5的腳丫反而變得很普通的size(中偏大啦,也小不到哪)
小時候不愛穿皮鞋,成天穿著球鞋到處跑,所以腳板很寬,第一次買高跟鞋,看見自己的腳扭曲變形的擠在裡面,覺得很懊惱,很多漂亮的鞋都不能穿,隨著上班穿高跟鞋的機會越來越多,腳的形狀也在長期穿高跟鞋之下被塑行很完整,我現在顯少有買高跟鞋擠不進去的煩惱,看著自己的腳丫子,我心裡想著:穿高跟鞋是不是變相的綁小腳?社會對於女性有一定的審美觀,特別是在台灣,不能太胖,不能沒肉,不能太黑,不能太壯,不能太高...凡舉任何偏向男性特質的特點,都不被認定是美麗,太壯像男生,太黑也像男生,反正像男生就沒有女人味
我記得我在Sydney唸書的日子,曾經和一個男生去約會吃飯,吃完飯我們開車去New town散步,走著走著走到附近的海邊,我就脫下了鞋子坐下來,那個男孩子看到我的腳,只說了一句話"你的腳趾頭好像年糕",那天之後我們再也沒連絡,朋友問起我個date如何,我說"He used a kind of food to describe my toe on the first date. He said it looks like rice cake!"朋友們皆笑的捧腹,並安慰我"So it's your first date? And your last date, hun?"
我看著我圓圓的腳趾頭,心想:我覺得它長得到挺可愛的嘛~stuff him!
因為腳趾頭事件,我終結了一段約會,不過因為這樣可以看清一個人倒也不差,只是腳大指頭圓就不女人味不美了嗎?所以全世界的女人一窩蜂的把自己的腳塞近高跟鞋了,然後在踩了一整天鞋子回到家後再心疼的按著腳丫子喊酸喊疼,我開始覺得高跟鞋是男人主宰的社會審美觀所製造的產物,不然誰到了35歲還會和穿布鞋的女生約會?
好在我現在的男友覺得我的腳趾頭也很可愛,不過他說它像湯圓...
Five odd habits
Recently, my friends wrote five odd habits of their own on their blog in turns. I was asked to write my own one. It took me a while to think about it. And I figure out I have lots of odd habits regarding to dining.
Here's my five odd habits:
1. I always unpack my bag every time when I get home. I can't stand seeing my stuff staying in that bag overnight. And it annoys me if others do so. haha
2. I always chew every 粉圓(the black pearl) into two parts before I swollow it everytime when I drink the bubble tea (pearl milk tea.) I just love the feeling to use my teeth to cut it into a half-half.
3. I always pull out the pickle in the cheese burger of McDonald's. I don't like their pickles.
4. I play with my hair everytime when I think things.
5. I don't drink milk tea, but I can accept pearl milk tea. That just gives a great combination. I wouldn't finish the drink once the 粉圓 are eaten up.
What are your five odd habits?
photos
I've arranged the photos we took during the trip. Please check out
my album website.
Tattoo
I went to the south for a three-day summer get-away trip with my family, family's friends and my boyfriend (with a total up to 13 people joining in!) It was set for surfing originally. However, my notch wound on my left arm didn't allow me to do so. We stayed at a fab cozy villa
船帆石658 and celebrated Uncle Mike's and my birthday in advance (note: we were born on the same Lunar date.) Uncle Mike's wife Kathy bought me a lovely silver necklace as present, so I bought him back a delicate Tiramisu in return. We 'kids' rushed into the villa with holding the candlelit cake as surprise, which dragged the trip to a climax.
We drank till drunk every night and fed ourselves with numerous delicious ethnic foods every day. Beside the the activity at the beach (I choosed to take a nap under the umbrella,) we also went for car racing. That turned out to be a hilarious activity with seeing many 40+ year old adults crazily doing car racing after each other. Thank god it didn't give them the heart stroke.
The journey was packed with fun and relaxation. I tried the tattoo sticker as my first time. I was given with a beautiful butterfly on my back. It was drawn within a min, quite amazing, isn't it? I'm still working on the photos. I'll attach the photo website at a later time!
bravery
One of mom's good friend was told to have the breast cancer lately. I think this worth writing because she is so brave in my eyes.
She's my mom's ex-colleague, a really young woman having two daughters studying in primary school. She's one those people who live in a regular happy life without any pernicious habits. But it turned out to be malignant tumors, and the tumor cell is growing its extension to her lymphatic system. Hence, cobalt 60 therapy is inevitable. Mom cried when she told her the bad news. She just shrugged and smiled like it never happen. I can sense that could probably be the hardest smile ever, and the only smile, which made my mom cried harder.
She's sort of the happy-go-lucky person, who is always so optimistic about everything. So she went to a trip with her family and came back to town to start the therapy treatment. She and mom met up for coffee days ago (they have coffee chat every other week as routine.) She told mom that she started to lose hair. "Aren't you frightened?" she was asked. "Well, a little bit at the beginning when I saw the first pinch of hair I combed down," she answered with stirring her black tea serenely. Then mom was aware that she has quit her coffee addiction these days because coffee gave her dark colour urine.
I think she's really brave and I can never be so optimistic like her if I were the one who suffered. I believe most of us feel frightened when facing death. We might have the breakdown or tuck ourselves into desperate trauma. Me would be a good case that I've been pretty much buggered these days about the interruption in my normal life caused from the illness. And her story taught me a lot. I remembered I had been to a lecture talking about life & death when I was in college. The lecturer asked each of us to talk about the time management if we only had 3 months left. Every one was quiet at the beginning. I think all of us never think about this issue in our life, and it appeared more difficult once we really need to do it. Then after the month-long discussion, I found most of the people choose to do nothing, but spend time with friends and family like what we are living right now. I reckon that kind of tranquil pattern of life would probably be the most precious thing for ill people. So I should be happier because I'm having that life right now, isn't it?
Somehow, I still feel fxxked up.
May every one with healthy and happiness life.
Endlessness
I've been suffering from the annoying allergy illness these weeks. The condition went much better off except I'm still having some light rash over my legs and body, which will need another one to two weeks to go off. I went back to the hospital today to see my biopsy report and also had my stitches out. The doctors from both hospitals couldn't figure out the exact reason for my disease. So I guess that's just it! (I reckon that's one of the reasons why I'm not in the mood now. It feels like you've been through a lot for not even knowing what would cause the whole suffering. And that's really irritating!)
Then, I had my stitches out, which was really a good thing because my family has been plannning to go to the beach at the south on this weekend. In that case, I can at least have some fun at the beach (although the doctor suggested me not to get much tan at this moment.) However, I guess the trouble never end. My wound actually cracked after I went back home. It's just hurting enough to see the wound bleeding which means I'll need to go through all of this AGAIN. So I was sent back to the hospital to have the operation, which gave me another "brand new" 8 stitiches. And this time, it'll take double time up to 2 weeks to have the wound grow back to recovery. That denotes my beach holiday has been destroyed already. What a bummer!
We couldn't call it off or postpone it to a later time due to the accommodation. I never know this could affect me so much, but I'm sooooooooo NOT in the mood for the trip now. I thought I could be more optimistic than this, but it's just hard this time. I guess I've been expecting the trip ages ago, and I'm just sick of all the trauma.
My hospital journey
Due to the serious rash that I got last weekend, I paid four trips to the hospital within five days. A really scary number!
I went to hospital A this morning, and the doctor said my rash condition wasn't getting even a bit better. He started to consider it as something more than just hives and immediately suggested me be hospitalized in order to proceed some physical checks. However, there's no vacancy from the wards and the doctor didn't look really professional. So I was transferred to hospital B in the afternoon. The dermtatologist diagnosed my illness as a rare rash (多形性紅斑), and gave me a series of examinations including blood check and biopsy. And I got FIVE stitches for that painful biopsy, and unlimited needles from the blood exam. And I cried, as the first time I felt scary.
There are lots of things happend along the way, some are terrifying and some hilarious. I'm waiting for my report to come out next Wed, and hopefully, I'll be able to have my stitches out by then. Thanks for the persons who worried about me. I'm getting better, much better, I'm sure. I'll take care of myself.
Thank Simon, my dear love, who has accompanied me to the hospital and took care of me while I had fever these days. I know you got pressure from the impending TOEFL exam, but you are still there when I need you. That's really sweet and thoughtful of you. I just want to say I LOVE YOU.
Thank my dear mom, dad and sis, who have been worrying about me and giving me lots of care and help. You are always the best.
Thank my friends, who called or wrote me e-mails. It's nice to hear from you.
Thank the doctors and nurses, who have been taking care of me these days.
I do hope I'll recover soon, so I can get away from those terrifying physical exams. So wish me luck!
Hives
It's been a while since my last post. I am sick with serious hives these days, which gave me rash all over my body, face and even the head skin. I look like a total MONSTER, which is scary enough to drive people away. And it does actually. I was sent to the hospital twice over the weekend. People kept looking at me and some even couldn't help ask what diseases I got. All of a sudden, I became popular, but in a very bad way!
The worse is that I kept getting high temperature since last night, which drove my mom bonkers. She always believes high temperature would cause one into a mental-challenged person. So I was almost sent to the hospital for the third time within three days. But I'm getting better now (at least the rash spots unite together and looks like a new color of skin.)
It's weird that I can still be in a good mood even though I look terrible. Maybe it's because I can get a week off from work, which is not too bad!
